The birth was at home. The birthing woman had a history of postpartum hemmorhage so it was important that she nurse the baby to prevent excess bleeding. The adopting mother “caught” the baby—that was lovely. Then, to my surprise, the birthing mother invited the adopting woman to strip down and get into the water tub to be with the baby. Both women were naked together in the water tub with baby between them and the adopting Dad was looking on. Once the birthing woman had had a couple of hours of “baby velcroed to skin” time (in and out of the tub), the adopting woman took the baby into the next room in her robe and privately put the baby to breast (sitting in a rocking chair). There was about a 6 hour period of both families being together and then the adopting parents took the little girl home. The adopting woman had already had one adopted baby and had breastfed fully. We had started with an SNS feeding system (those bottles that you hang around your neck with the tubing that goes to the nipple).
By coincidence (or not), the woman who birthed in this scenario had supplied breast milk for the adopting couples’ first adopted child a few years earlier. For various reasons, she relinquished her second baby for this adoption. She pumped her breasts and the adopting father drove daily to pick up her breast milk for the new baby. I think the birthing mother pumped for about a month and then the adopting mother was able to meet all the baby’s needs.
This adoption was a “win/win” situation for everyone involved except for the biological grandmother who was very heartbroken about her only grand daughter going to another family. When the adopting parents were told about this, they simply said “Oh, she can be the baby’s grandmother. . . she can come over for dinner every Sunday, if she wants.” Problem solved.
These kind of events make me so happy to be a human being. . . people can be very great.